How To Know if You're the Creepy Guy at Work

Every workplace has one - that creepy guy no one wants to be around.  The creepy guy at work comes in various forms - he might be older, slovenly and disheveled, and mumble when he talks, or he may look perfectly normal but smell like a urinal.  If you don't know who the creepy guy at your work is, you may want to start asking yourself if it's you.  If you answer yes to any of the following questions, you just may be the creepy guy at your workplace.

  1. Do groups of people disperse when you approach them? Unless you're the boss and the group is socializing, this is a good sign that people see your presence as an end to a good conversation, and this is the first sign that you may be the creepy guy.
  2. Do coworkers refuse to enter your cubicle? Pay careful attention to how close your coworkers come to your desk.  If they need to speak with you but do so only over the phone or across the aisle, they may just think you're the creepy one.  To test this, invite someone in.  If they back slowly away without breaking eye contact, you may be the creep.
  3. Do the underarms of your dress shirts have yellow stains? While not an absolute indicator on its own, most people think a lack of personal hygiene pretty creepy.  However, it may also be the most easily correctable.  As you're getting dressed in the morning, lift up your arms.  If you see yellow, think creepy.
  4. Have you been spoken to by your boss about limiting physical contact with your coworkers? If you're the type of guy who likes to have group hugs after meetings or give shoulder rubs to reduce office stress, you may want to rethink your actions.  The creepy guy at work is almost always the one that initiates unwanted physical contact.
  5. You've never been invited to an after-work function (but after hearing about a gathering, you always invite yourself).

These are telltale signs of the creepy guy at work.  It's alright if it's simply that you're not invited to an after-work function.  However, the creepy guy at work always seems to find out about these get-togethers and show up inexplicably.  If you've convinced yourself that your co-workers simply forgot to invite you and continue to show up anyway, you may just be the creepy guy.

Remember: every office has a creepy guy.  There's an old saying that says that every game has a patsy, and if you don't know who the patsy is, it's you.  If you can't figure out who the creepy guy is at work, you may have to consider taking a look in the mirror.


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