If you're a single woman in search of love, one of the initial challenges that you'll face is determining whether a dating prospect shows any romantic interest in you or not. And more importantly, is the man's interest strong enough to pursue you by asking you out for a date?
First of all, you need to know that men give off plenty of subtle signals and signs of attraction when they are interested in a woman. The more subtle ways that a man flirts can be easy to miss when you aren't looking carefully:
- Eye contact is a great way to know if he likes you. A shy guy will turn away when you look at him. This may be your cue to make the first move. But a man that wants to get your attention by making eye contact and smiling is interested in you in a romantic way. The best way to let him know the same is to meet his gaze and smile.
- A lot of chatter can indicate his feelings. Men tend to want to be portrayed in a certain light when they are trying to get a woman's attention. When a man likes a woman he will talk about himself all the time, emphasizing his positive features. Another sign is slight touching during the conversation. When a man likes you he will touch your hands and shoulders. Make sure to smile to let him know that you like him as well.
- A guy that does the same things you do may be interested in you. Have you noticed that he is everywhere you are? A man that likes a woman will take an interest in what she likes. This may mean showing up at study groups or signing up for new activities. If the man you like is now around all the time this may be by design. Take the opportunity to have a conversation with him and see where it goes!
- If you are getting a lot of compliments this may be a sign that he likes you. When a man likes a woman he will compliment her. This is one of the oldest forms of flirting. All women love to hear that they are pretty, nice and smart. These and many other positive remarks are a sure sign that he likes you too!
- Buying you gifts or giving you things you need is indicative of male flirting. Men are naturally pulled towards being good providers. As such, a man will buy a woman presents and give her a variety of items to show interest. If he is showering you with presents, then he is definitely interested in being more than just friends.
However, sometimes it's hard to tell if he has any interest in you at all, and just what that interest means. Is it friendship or romance? With this challenge in mind, here are some pointers for more accurately gauging a man's romantic interest:
- He may be courteous but not curious. Some men may be well-mannered and show this by remembering your name, making eye contact, engaging in small talk, being an attentive listener, and asking questions with apparent sincere interest. But this may only be an indicator of courtesy, emotional maturity, or good human relations skills. While all these positive things are helpful in creating a friendly atmosphere, it would be unwise for you to jump to the conclusion that the man is definitely interested in a romantic way.
His body language will tell you that. As he is gathering information he will listen and remember important things you say. He will also lean in when you speak to him. If this is not happening, it may simply be a case of a more refined, civilized man acting in a courteous manner towards you as a person. Don't mistake these as signals that a guy likes you.
- He may be curious, but not actually be interested in or even like you. Sometimes you will run across a man who expresses a lot of curiosity in the way he asks questions, gives you his full attention, and keeps his eyes riveted on you. But these behaviors don't automatically mean that the man is interested in dating you or that he has developed any feelings of affection towards you. He may just find you to be interesting looking and/or he may be already involved with another woman and this is his one seemingly harmless way of enjoying the variety of other women in a detached, non-threatening way.
- He may like you some, but not enough to risk the pressure of rejection. A man may have positive feelings for you, but those feelings aren't strong enough or clear enough at this point to make the effort of pursuing you aggressively. It could be that the circumstances of his life make it much easier and less painful to just let this romantic opportunity pass. Perhaps he feels the competition for you is too stiff, that you're already involved with another man, or that you don't think very highly of him. In any case, the guy figures that it's just not worth the hassle to pursue you and feel the pressure of a possible rejection. On the other hand, if a man starts asking around with your mutual acquaintances about you, then that may be his way of gathering all the facts before making his big calculated move towards asking you out. This could be considered one of the sure signs a guy likes you.
- He may like you enough to overcome his fears and ask you out on a date. If a man actually asks you out for a date, then that confirms his initial interest and positive feelings in the clearest way. If he backs that up by making a real effort in planning the date, spending money, treating you with respect, and showing you a good time, then you may be well on your way to being asked out again. You can help your cause towards continuing this dating relationship by: expressing gratitude, allowing the man to get comfortable, enjoying yourself on the date, and engaging in lively conversation that leaves a pleasant imprint on the man's heart and mind.
- He likes you enough to want a relationship with you. A man could actually like you, ask you out on a few dates, and still end up giving up the pursuit. If his feelings of affection or desire aren't strong enough or don't come quickly enough, he may fade away from you. Good indicators of a man who wants an expanded relationship with you include: discussing the future together, showing you off to his friends, introducing you to his family, enjoying and maintaining daily contact, respecting your timetable for physical intimacy, opening up his feelings and revealing his sincere intentions to you.
- He likes you enough to want an exclusive relationship for keeps. What you don't know after a few dates with a man is who you're competing with. Two questions that remain are: 1) Does he like you more than anyone else in his life right now? And 2) Does he like you more than anyone else he's ever known? The answers to these questions will largely be determined in the future by the romantic chemistry that naturally develops between the two of you and the bonds of intimacy you start sharing with each other.
The Bottom Line
Men leave dating and romance clues all the time. For you, it's just a matter of finding and interpreting these clues correctly and not jumping to unwise conclusions. The dating tips above should help you in understanding men and figuring out how to tell if a guy likes you. Remember that gauging a man's level of sincere interest is a necessary skill that all smart women will want to possess in their pursuit of more enjoyable dating and successful long-term love relationships. Also, do not forget to check out various dating blogs to get further advice.