How To Be a Good Parent: Special Situations Such as Child Illness and Behavioral Problems

Part 3 of a 3-Part Series

We all know that boys are different from girls. Boys are more aggressive, want to solve a problem quickly and get it out of the way. Girls like to talk things over and resolve a problem in terms of relationships. Boys will fight at the drop of a match.

Girls will negotiate their way out of a problem. Boys want to be the boss so they are best raised under a reasonable set of unbreakable rules. (You probably should never let a boy off the hook when he breaks a rule.)

Either parent can resolve a problem with a boy. Sometimes a mother resolves things by simply saying, "Just wait until your father gets home, Sonny Boy!" That is often the easy way out. Later the same mother will say to her husband, "You let him off too easy again."

Mothers resolve the problems of girls better than men, but when a girl goes to her father for help, he should be there for her. The above is not about behavioral problems. These kids are normal and proper teaching in the home can help to avoid many problems. But some kids have special needs that are related to abnormal health.

Sadly, some children have debilitating diseases that severely limit or even curtail normal activity. These children need lots of love and constant care.

Here are some special situations that need a great deal of wisdom, loving care, and professional assistance:

  1. Autism. Autism was in the neighborhood when I was a boy. It was not as rare as everyone now thinks. We get reports that the incidence of autism has greatly increased. That is true. Almost every extended family has an autistic child or two, including mine. Some suspect that the increase was due to mercury in immunization serums given to children. When I was taking physical chemistry, our usually silent professor came to our workbench and told us how deadly mercury can be. (You’ve heard of the Mad Hatter’s Disease haven’t you?)

    Researchers have not proven that mercury is the culprit in autism. According to the article on autism at PsychologyToday, "Autism is a brain disorder that affects a person's ability to merge the stimuli they intake and communicate effectively with others." Autism shows up rather abruptly in a perfectly normal child. At least that is the way it was with my grandchild. How well an autistic child can be assimilated into regular school activities depends where you live. Some school systems have excellent programs to help autistic children. Whether you have an autistic child or not, you should know about it and teach your children what they can do to make the life of an autistic child better.

  2. Attention Deficit Disorders. According to CHADD, "Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (AD/HD) is a condition affecting children and adults that is characterized by problems with attention, impulsivity, and overactivity. It affects between 3-7 percent of school-age children, and between 2-4 percent of adults." If your child or a child you know cannot respond thoughtfully to a stressful situation, like obeying your house rules, he may have a chemical imbalance in the brain that needs treatment. Also, your children need to know how to deal with such a child. Such disorders may cause a child to completely ignore your instructions and rules rather than react to them. Read the following article to understand more about the situation: Help4adhd
  3. Addiction. Addictions come in many flavors. Caffeine and nicotine addictions may occur along with more serious addictions. In my activities, I found that if a particular addiction is common among a youth group, then bringing the parents and children together can help correct difficult situations. However, professional help is almost always needed. Follow the links below:
    Sex and Love:

This is the conclusion of this series on parenting. Hopefully, you've read my earlier installments on how to nurture children and how to prepare your children for adulthood. In the future, I plan to write an article that will consider the differences in raising boys and girls. I have to study up first.



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