Being friends after the breakup is possible. But this can be hard and the difficulty depends on how close you are to each other, how long you stayed together, the kind of persons you are, and the reason for the breakup. Well at least, remaining friends after a breakup is an option to make everything less painful.
Try these ways on how to be friends after a breakup:
- Give it time. The old saying “time heals” remains true to these days. Give yourself and the person time to be healed. You can’t expect the wound to heal overnight. Give it a month or more than that. If you are both ready again to face each other as friends, then it’s time to start being friends.
- Open up the friendship option. When you breakup, let the person know that you would still want to keep the friendship. This tip is only applicable for a calm breaking up, where the two of you are seriously talking about the relationship. This kind of breaking up is more possible for a future friendship.
- Have a group date. The first time you meet the person as a friend, it will be better that you go out as a group. Remind your other friends not to talk about your past. Avoid talking about the past, too. In case the person is still bitter, never answer any spark of confrontation. This will only make things worse. Instead, stay away with that topic and stick with light conversations about job, politics, friends, or other people.
- Explain why you want to be friends. What are the reasons why you still want to be friends after the breakup? Perhaps if you explain your side, the person will understand your point and agree with that setup. Most people want to remain friends in the hope of forming a good relationship out of the broken one.
- Be patient. It takes time to heal the wounds of breaking up. Buy it takes a longer time for the healing process if the person still has hope for the relationship. Let the person know that you are firm with your decision to end the relationship. Also, tell the person that you are willing to wait and that you will always be there as a friend.
- Don’t pressure the person. Never demand for friendship and never pressure the person to move on and be friends with you. Every person has his own pace of moving on. For some, it takes only a little time but some people spend almost forever to move on. The more pressure you give to the person, the more impossible it is for you to end up as friends.
Remember to respect whatever decision the person will make. Some people will feel so much pain that being friends with you will be more painful for them. In time, the pain will go away and maybe, the right time will come for the both of you to be friends. When that time comes, maybe you’ll realize that the person may not be the best lover but he can be the best friend you can have.