Do you think a baby remembers through some sort of biological connection that her parents bonded with her during her breast-feeding and infancy stage? Do you remember your infancy? You don't? Yes, a gazillion other people can relate with that answer, too!
Why then is it important for parents to bond with a new baby? In an inexplicable way, it seems so natural for parents to want to bond with their newborn and vice-versa. If this was not important, why then does your instinct kick in when you have your newborn close to you? How can you explain how a newborn cries when a stranger picks her up and instantly quiets down when her parents do the same thing? Yup, bonding with a newborn is important.
Now dad, since mom is getting first dibs on your newborn because she gets to breastfeed her, you can do your own bonding time as well.
Here's how:
- Leave your pajamas in her bassinet and crib. Your newborn should become familiar with or accustomed to your scent. Since dads spend most of their time bringing home the bacon and working for a living, the best memory that your newborn will have of you is your scent. When you come home, your newborn will know it's you cuddling her because of your scent.
- Call home when you can. Talk to you newborn when you call home. Do not worry about people looking at you strangely because you are making ridiculous cooing sounds. What's important is that your newborn gets to hear your voice even if she is too young to make out what you are saying.
- Don't compare notes. Face it. Your wife will naturally have more time with your newborn. Don't dwell on it. Just continue bonding with your newborn at your own pace.
- Believe in the power of touch. Studies show that newborns grow up happier and more secure when touched as a newborn. Massage your baby's feet during naptime. Massage her tummy during bath time. Hold her frail and tiny hands when she's breastfeeding from her mom.
- Have constant eye contact with your newborn. Though at infancy she still cannot see very clearly, she will be able to make out forms and shapes. Cradle her in your arms and sing to her while making eye contact. In time, she will arrive at a point where she will smile because she knows it's you who is cradling her.
- Sing to your newborn. As a continuation of tip #5, you won't make a mistake with soothing music. Your newborn will love the timbre of your voice singing along with the melody of nursery rhyme themes and lullabies.
- Go to pedia visits with your wife and newborn. Actively participate in doctor's visits because it is at these visits that you can learn more about your baby's development and responses. If it's time for booster shots, you can help soothe your baby's cries, which are also a part of bonding and daddy-hood.
- Volunteer when your wife is too tired. You can stay up nights and feed your newborn a bottle of milk or change nappies when your wife appears to be tired to do these things. It's a fantastic opportunity to bond with your newborn (even when smelly nappies are involved).
When your newborn grows up to become an adult, she won't forget the loving closeness that you shared with her especially if you have photos to show for it.
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