Breaking off an engagement is always a very difficult thing to do, especially since the engagement already builds up plenty of expectations on the where you and your partner’s relationship is heading. in some cases, however, there is simply a need to break off the engagement, such as when you realize that your feelings for your partner has gone, or that you have problems with commitment, trust, and even monogamy that can only worsen after marriage and which can lead to the greater problem of divorce. Here’s how you can break an engagement.
Know the reasons. Be sure of the reasons for breaking up the engagement. You cannot simply shrug when you tell someone who loves you deeply enough to promise you a wedding that you simply want to break up – with no good reasons. Whatever your reasons, whether a loss of the feeling of love or other problems, be honest and sincere as you tell your partner about this. Your fiancé deserves to know why, and will be helpful in the healing process after the break up.
Be civilized. Next, be sure that you are polite as you break up. Avoid getting into heated arguments, and anticipate that your partner may be more than just a bit angry after the break up. Nonetheless, do not fall into all of the provocations that your partner may make especially since people tend to blow up arguments when the engagement has been broken off. Be civilized at all times, however, and as the person to break up during the engagement, be understanding enough to allow your partner to vent. Try placing yourself in your partner’s shoes so that you will better understand exactly how betrayed he or she will feel once the engagement has been broken off. Also be sure that the ring is returned once the engagement has been broken off.
Timing. When you will break up is equally important. You need to set aside a specific time to break up the engagement. Unless you schedule the time when you will break the engagement, you may find yourself blurting it out the bad news in inopportune times which can be embarrassing for both you and your partner, and which can make the break off even more traumatic. Give yourself time to think through the idea of breaking off the engagement, but once you are decided, be sure not to prolong the time before you actually tell your partner about the break, since letting more time pass will be difficult both for you and your partner.
Discuss the implications. After the two of you have come to terms with the broken off engagement, the next step is to talk about the implications of the act. The two of you can discuss exactly how you to will deal with the relationship after the engagement has been called off. In most circumstances, the couple will choose to break up any relationship between them, in some others an agreement can be reached to continue the relationship but no longer with the intention of getting engaged in the near future.
After breaking off the engagement, be sure that both of you notify your friends and family about the decision. Do this personally, instead of simply sending bulk emails to your entire contacts list in your email, or simply sending text messages via mobile phone.