How To Cope When Your Child Marries and Changes Religion

What if one day your child asks your permission to get married and at the same time plans to change his religion? Will you give your blessings?

We are aware that sooner or later, our child will have a life of his own. It might be painful at first but these are the realities of life. Basically, if your child walks up to you and asks your consent regarding the statement above, you have nothing to do but to handle the situation in a supportive manner right from the very start. Remember that you are not losing a child and in fact are even gaining another one.

• Be compassionate. More than anything else, your child needs your utmost support on his decision. Reassure him that nothing has changed and that you are happy with his choice. From the very beginning, if your child has told you that nobody forced him to change religion, just remind him that this is another chapter he has to face for the rest of his life and he should be ready. 

• Accept your in-law. Welcome your son-in-law or daughter-in-law to the family. Remember that your child chooses him/her as a partner until the end of time. If you feel like talking to your in-law about their religion, don't make any comments or judgment. Instead look at the brighter side and perhaps you will be convinced that it is not a bad idea at all.

• Do your own research. If you are not satisfied with all the information given to you by your in-law, then do your own study. It isn't bad to explore other people's beliefs as long as you don't bad-mouth about it. In fact, this might help you understand better why your child is convinced to change religion. 

• Ask around. For sure, you know someone who has also done the same thing. Find out some relevant information such as how they were able to cope with the transition, how was the first year, or did they ever wish that they did not change faith at all.

• Give respect. The only thing that your child desires is for you to be happy with his preference. So before the two of you get hurt because of these issues, give the appropriate respect and be happy. 

• Move ahead. It's time for you to enjoy life with your partner. Go for a grand vacation, join social groups, play your favorite sport, in short, have your own life. Be proud of your child who is married and has changed religion; he is happy with his life now and you have to feel that way too about your own life.

• Don't meddle with their issues. It's usual for married couples to have petty quarrels and fights. If your child comes home to you one day with his luggage, don't ask the details. Instead make him know that you are both adjusting to the situation and you both need to compromise. 

• Pray. Find your solitude and meditate within your own religion. Pray for your child's inner peace and happiness.