Every human being has a need and desire for authentic relationships. It is a basic need to want to be loved and accepted. A good long lasting relationship takes time, honesty and communication.
- Don’t limit your idea of relationships to romantic love. Relationships you have with your family and friends are just as important in nurturing you. Don’t discount the important and value of these platonic relationships in your search for your true love. Some long lasting love relationships start from friendships.
- Invest the time to build good relationships. You may form instant connections with people you meet, but it takes time to bond those connections you make. Take the time to get to know someone, spend time with them doing activities and talking about yourselves. This holds true for friendships, family time and for romantic relationships. Giving someone your time and attention is the best way to show someone you value them.
- Be honest in your interactions. Honesty is the basis of any authentic relationship. Be truthful when you talk to another. Don’t make up stories about yourself, or pretend to be someone else so they will like you. If you are honest upfront, you allow the other person the opportunity to get to know your authentic self. No one is perfect so no one expects perfection from you. A true friend and loved one will accept you for who you are. Don’t say things you think the other expects to hear. Even if you disagree, that’s all right.
- Be open. You will need to make yourself vulnerable to another person to bond with someone else. You cannot seek to know another person without allowing someone else to get a glimpse of your own self. Talk to the person about your dreams, hopes, desires, ambition and dislikes. It’s all right not to agree. If you do not allow someone to get close to you emotionally, you may think you are protecting yourself from heartache and pain, when you are actually limiting yourself from an opportunity to form authentic relationships and you will lose out in the end.
- Listen to the other person. It’s not enough to just reveal things about yourself. Allow the other person to be vulnerable to you as well. Listen to what they have to say. Don’t use the time you spend with them to just tell the other about yourself. Take the time to listen and pay attention to their responses and what they have to say.
- Stay connected. Once you have established a relationship with someone, keep in touch. It’s easier now because of technology, so you don’t even have to be geographically in the same place. Write someone, send a quick text message or call the person, just to let him know you are thinking of him. Include them in important announcements and events in your life. Even if you only see each other once a year, a long lasting relationship will survive distance and time if you reconnect properly every so often.
- In a romantic relationship, keep doing things that keep your bond alive. Go out on dates and touch bases throughout the day. Don’t take each other for granted to keep that emotional connection alive.
- Stay respectful. You may be comfortable with someone, but maintain the boundaries of respect and politeness around each other.
It takes work to create long lasting relationships. Invest yourself, the time and effort needed and the rewards will be immeasurable.