How To Deliver Classy Insults

There will come a time in your life when you feel that you need to make a stand against someone who is always condescending. There are people who have a superiority complex that can be irritating and aggravating over time. They think that they know it all and other people are all below them are not at par with them - may it be in terms of looks, achievements, skills, position within the company, financial capability or educational attainment.

If you are a constant target of such condescension, a few well-chosen words can do the trick of bringing such a person a peg or two down and leave her gaping. Here are some ways to deliver classy insults.

1. Check out the background of the person who thinks she is so clever that she cannot stand to be with someone of lesser stature, that is, according to her standards. It is best to know your enemy so that you can strike where it will hurt the most.

2. Work on the weakest point in the condescending person's armor. Most of the time this type of person is hiding something by presenting a different persona to the world. Your classy insult should be something personal that will take the focus away from you and put the person in the spot.

3. Be very knowledgeable about the subject so that your classy insult will be delivered with a big impact. Go back to all the times that the condescending person has attacked you and pinpoint the areas that she attacked. Make sure that you know everything about these areas so that you will be more intelligent, credible and knowledgeable than her. Then devise clever and concise retorts that will clearly pinpoint her shortcomings.

4. Read about the classic insults from celebrated personalities like Mark Twain, Sir Winston Churchill, Ernest Hemingway, George Bernard Shaw, Oscar Wilde, William Faulkner, Groucho Marx and Abraham Lincoln. There are other lesser known people who have delivered very clever insults that can make the target gape and those hearing it roll in laughter. Commit some well-known classy insults to memory that you can draw upon when the situation arises.

5. Choose the ones that will deliver the most impact and very apt for the occasion. Here are some that may apply to you, authors unknown:

  • Careful now, don't let your brains go to your head.
  • I've seen people like you but I have to pay admission.
  • Keep talking. Someday you'll say something intelligent.
  • Don't you love nature despite what it did to you?
  • At least there's one thing good about your body; it is not as ugly as your face.

6. Study some of the classy insults that have been quoted over and over delivered by great personalities, such as:

  • Some cause happiness wherever they go, some whenever they go. (Oscar Wilde)
  • He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of anyone I know. (Abraham Lincoln)
  • I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it. (Groucho Marx)
  • He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up. (Paul Keating)

7. When you have delivered your punch line, make your grand exit with head held high.

A classy insult should be well-thought of, clever and an intelligent remark. Delivery and timing play important roles in making a classy insult bring about the greatest impact.  Think about the situation and the ways that you can shut up the other person.


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