The heartbreak of losing at love can be devastating. Once you have let yourself cry and vent, you may be determined to take the next step. If you are ready to fall out of love, follow these steps and you will be on your way to making the break.
- Decide it wasn’t meant to be. Surviving with your heart intact may require strong self-talk. Remind yourself that just because your love fell apart, doesn’t mean you aren’t worth loving. Tell yourself that the relationship was not meant to be. Tell yourself that the right love for you is still out there. If it helps, make a list of all your ex’s flaws and the reasons why the love didn’t work out.
- Remove reminders of your loved one. Get rid of the cute photos, the clothes and gifts you’ve been hanging on to. Make a clean break by boxing it all up and getting the reminders out of your house.
- Take time to heal. Don’t rush out and force yourself to be fine and happy about your breakup. Allow yourself the time to accept the changes to your life and your emotions. Curl up on the sofa with ice cream and sappy movies. Or go for long runs on the beach. Find your method of healing and indulge in it for a few weeks.
- Start a project. Distraction may be all you need to fall out of love. Find another something to love. Start a new project or pick up an old hobby. If dancing or scrapbooking will keep your mind occupied, take a new class or join a new club. If joining doesn’t suit your personality, consider catching up on that spring cleaning you’ve been putting off. Cleaning your home of dust and dirt also helps you remove all remnants of your old love. Sweep them out with the trash and enjoy your newfound personal space.
- Make a list of things you want to do but couldn’t with your ex. When caught up in love, it can be easy to get distracted. While in the throes of love, you probably gave up plenty of activities, time with friends, and chances to do new things. Now is the time to make a list of all you missed. Then start checking things off that list as you do them.
- Reconnect with friends. If you missed out on activities, you likely missed out on your friends. Reconnect and ask your friends for support. If you didn’t rudely ditch them while involved with your love, they will still be there for you. Spend some time getting to know them again. Catching up with your friends will remind you of who you are and what makes you worth loving.
- Be open to new relationships. Being open does not mean jumping into a relationship or trying to find love again. Just don’t close yourself off from the possibility.
Falling out of love is a process. It cannot and should not happen overnight. Still, if you give yourself time and space, you will be able to break the hold a love has on you and move on with your life.