You can never force a man to marry you and if you persuade one who isn't ready then you are both in for a rough road. However, if you are interested in keeping the guy you have and encouraging him to offer the next step, there are some things you can do. Follow these steps and your man is more likely to want to marry you.
- Be comfortable in your own skin. Knowing that you are comfortable with who you are is attractive. It is probably what got you the man in the first place. Don't let your fears about where the relationship is going dent your confidence.
- Check your motives. Make sure that you want to make a life with this man not just have a splashy wedding. If you cannot see beyond the dream wedding then he might not be the man for you long term. If you are willing to spend your life with him regardless of the piece of paper, you are closer to having a future together.
- Let him see the benefits. There are benefits to marriage beyond a regular bed partner and someone to take out the trash. If you want a life together he needs to see those benefits. It also helps if those benefits are offered as partnership with or without the ring.
- Talk to him. Unless you talk about the future you cannot know where you are both headed or if you will take the path together. Don't talk about getting married. Instead talk about what you each want in life, your goals, your values and your fears. Develop and understanding of each other and he might start thinking forever all on his own.
- Avoid ultimatums and pressure. Don't drop hints like bridal magazines slipped in with his sports page. Don't tell him it's over if you don't get a ring by Christmas. This kind of pressure is why some men fear commitment in the first place. Take him how he is without the pressure for a big day.
- Relate to his family and friends. Getting to know his friends and family is a sign that you both think you have something more than a fling. He won't take you home to meet mom unless he cares about you. You need to show that the people in his life matter even if you think his little sister is a brat.
- Be positive. No man wants to spend his life with a whiner or complainer. No matter how much he loves you if you dwell on the negative he will think twice about committing to a life together.
- Romance him. Marriage is a partnership so you need to be willing to carry the weight, the good and bad. Don't expect him to always take the lead and do the romancing. You need to do your fair share. Take him to dinner. Curl up on the couch with a movie he wants to watch. Hold his hand or touch his arm to let him know you are thinking of him and that he is important. Men need to know they are loved as much as women do.
Lasting relationships tend to head toward marriage. If that's where you want to go you can get the man to marry you. Follow these steps and make the commitment worthwhile for both of you and you just might be able to keep your man.