Although she often gets a bad reputation, your mother-in-law is usually quite an amazing woman. After all, she raised your spouse, didn't she? It's important to have a good relationship with your mother-in-law, to show your spouse that you care about them and to teach your children respect for their grandparents. If you're struggling with the idea though, you're not alone. Some of us just need a few pointers when it comes to having a good relationship with our mother-in-law and these tips are offered below.
Respect her. Your mother-in-law has a lot of life experience. Although you may not always agree with her, it's important to show her the respect that she deserves. She can have a lot of influence on your life through her child (your spouse), so you want to start off a good relationship with her by giving her deserved place on that throne.
Be helpful. Your mother-in-law will appreciate a good work ethic, no matter the task. By being helpful, you're proving yourself to her as a good person. Offer to drive her places she needs to go, help with repairs around the house and never, ever expect anything in return. Your generous attitude will leave your mother-in-law proud to be in your company.
Communicate often. The worst complaint of a mother-in-law is that she feels out of the loop. Think about it: you call your mother all the time, but how often do you talk to your mother-in-law? It's important to allow your mother-in-law into your life if you want to have a good relationship with her. Tell her about the little things and make her feel like she's a part of your immediate family (without dishing out too much personal info!)
Make her proud. If you want to have a good relationship with your mother-in-law, you need to be a person that she wants to have a relationship with. That is, you need to be a good person in your daily life so that you make her proud to have you as a son or daughter-in-law. Bad habits, jail visits and couch potato syndrome are only going to worsen your relationship. Make the most of your life and your mother-in-law will take notice and want to have a good relationship with you.
Treat her child well. If you think about it, your mother-in-law has raised your spouse from day 1, so it's no wonder that she struggles with the idea of her child living with you. Part of a good relationship with your mother-in-law is giving her the peace of mind that her child is loved, appreciated and cared for. She will be much more pleasant and approachable knowing that you're spoiling her child just like she would. Plus, it will give you two something to talk and laugh about.
Communication is a big part of having a good relationship with your mother-in-law, but it’s not the only factor that contributes to a good relationship. The bond between you two needs to be formed of mutual respect, understanding and pride. It will take some effort, but it’s a crucial task if you want a happy life for you and your spouse.