How To Help Your Dying Friend

Helping a dying friend may in fact be the hardest thing you ever have to do. It can be very difficult to see your friend in pain, and many people just don't know what to do in this situation. It's very important not to avoid seeing your friend in their last weeks or months. There's no right thing to say or do; you can help your dying friend simply by being there. Here's how to help your dying friend:

1. Don't avoid the issue. Many people try to avoid talking about death, even when imminent, because it is scary. However, understand that your friend may want to talk about it, at least briefly. They may also need a listening ear as they come to terms with the end of their life. Be willing to talk about it, but try not to dwell on the inevitable, because this can be depressing. Try to talk about it as much or as little as they want to talk about it. Try not to give too much advice, especially medical, since you aren't an expert in these subjects.
2. Be available. Remember that this is your last chance to spend time with your friend. You may need to put your own life on hold for awhile to be there for your friend. Your friend may want to go out and do things, if they're still able to, or may simply want to sit and talk. Be there when they need you, and do whatever they ask of you. Try to be there 24-7, whenever you're needed, either over the phone or in person.
3. Be encouraging, but realistic. Be careful of your wording. Let your friend know that they are not alone, but don't give false hope. If the doctors have told your friend that they will not recover from this illness, it would be cruel of you to reassure them that they will get better. Share happy memories and talk about fun times in the past, but realize that these happy times are over now.
4. Make time for yourself. Even if you plan to be around your dying friend all the time in these days or weeks, make time for yourself to grieve. Even while your friend is still living, it makes sense to visit a counselor to help sort out your own thoughts. Find an outlet for your grief. You'll be able to be a better friend this way.
5. Understand your friend's energy levels. Death comes differently for all people, and you need to understand your friend's physical and mental conditions as it affects their daily life. If your friend still has the energy to participate in activities, do whatever they want to do. These may include everyday activities like shopping, or special activities that your friend has always wanted to do. As your friend grows weaker, she may want to sit and talk, watch movies or television, or play a board game. Understand that your friend will probably need some alone time, too, and may need assistance with household tasks like cooking, cleaning, or driving.

Helping a dying friend requires you to be strong. Be there for your friend as they have throughout your life. In order to help your dying friend, you may want to learn more about their illness so that you can understand what they are going through physically. The most important thing is that you are always there to listen and to do whatever your friend wants you to do.