How To Keep from Arguing

There are many ways to avoid arguing, it pays to know what they are. Arguing can be the bane of any relationship. Unresolved conflicts, frequent or serious argument, and hostility are among the top reasons why many relationships fail. This is because most human beings, by nature, are very peaceful and don't enjoy conflict. Which can cause arguing to be the worst thing you can do for your relationship.

If you want to keep your relationship, you must learn to keep from arguing. There are many different ways you can do this. Many methods take practice, but with a little bit of patience and motivation, you'll find yourself arguing less often and possibly even ending conflicts before they become too "heated."

You don't always have to be "right." Remembering that it's okay to be "wrong," can help avoid a massive argument and can shut the conflict down before it starts. If you find yourself not really caring about the particular topic at hand, but only about whether you're "right" or not, then it can be in your best interest and that of the other person, if you simply let them "win" the argument.  This can be one of the best ways to keep from arguing.

Don't argue for argument's sake. If you can calmly and rationally approach the subject, there's absolutely no reason why you should be arguing. If you find that the topic is simply too stressful or volatile to discuss the matter right at the moment, agree to come back and address the issue later with the other person and take a "time-out" to calm down. There are seldom such serious issues that they must be addressed right then and there, many times, waiting a few hours - or even a few days - can make a world of difference in getting the issue handled. Sometimes things look different later and this can help you keep from arguing.

Use "I" statements. We've all heard it, and it's still true - using "I" statements rather than "you" statements shifts the pressure off of the other person and doesn't put them on the defensive as badly. When trying to diffuse an argument, the last thing you want is to say something that's going to set the arguing off again.  Keep from arguing by avoiding any type of confrontational and offensive words that will put the other person on the defensive.

Avoid stating "always" and "never" when arguing. These are two opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to statements - but when you state them while arguing, all you'll do is fan the flames and make the situation even more heated. Avoid using exaggerations and extremes when arguing, even if that means you must walk away from the argument to avoid further confrontation.

You can keep from arguing by simply refusing to do so. Try to ensure that you only discuss potentially volatile subjects when you and the other person are both calm and not over-tired, hungry or excessively stressed. Don't try to discuss serious matters, for example, at mealtimes or bedtimes - this is a surefire way to cause arguments.


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