Happily ever after floats over and over in our minds when we first fall in love. But the stark reality of marriage is a far cry from the Cinderella fairytale. As we lazily daydream about a wonderful life with our spouse, we may be suddenly awakened by the possibility of it all being over. Understanding the dynamics of marriage is not an easy process. When most enter into marriage, it is with the hopes of being able to grow old together. Some keep the picture of a mature couple sitting in two rocking chairs on the porch sipping lemonade while their children and grandchildren sit at their feet.
It is not always easy to spot the signs so that you will know that it is over. Love is blind and at some point in our lives, we may have to deal with it being over. There is not a universal indicator that can be used to measure the status of marriages but maybe this list may shed some light on the subject.
It may be over when:
- Your spouse displays a very hostile attitude toward you at all times.
- When there is a complete breakdown of communication between you.
- No affection is shown toward you under any circumstances.
- Wedding band is not being worn.
- Has a new secretive friend that they will not talk with you about.
- Your name may be removed from the checking and savings accounts without your prior knowledge.
- Will not have sex with you.
- May choose to sleep separately.
- Frequent late night conversations with other individuals.
- If you always got flowers and gifts but they suddenly stop.
- Will go to the store or various other places at odd times during the day or night without you.
- Will not tell say that they love you.
- Does not acknowledge your wedding anniversary or any other special days like your birthday.
- You no longer hear words like honey or darling but they refer to others using those words.
- Will not say that you look nice or beautiful.
- When you reach for their hands, they pull away from you.
- Your spouse has no desire to go places with you.
What may be a sign for one person, is not one for another. Males may recognize that the relationship is over before females realize major problems exist. Many suggest seeking professional counseling when problems get out of hand. It is not a good idea to discuss your marital problems with everyone. You will get so many different distorted views that will only confuse you more.
Marriage and relationships takes work by both partners. If you are willing to do the work, then you may just achieve the happiness that you so desire.