How To Lead a Peaceful Life

After spending considerable years in life in search of money, position, power, status, conjugal bliss and so on, many times we end up with a feeling that, in the bargain, we have lost peace in life. We feel peace is more precious than many other things we were hunting around for. By the time we reach such a conclusion, we have already developed such deep-rooted tendencies, behavioral patterns and mindsets that we consequently find ourselves enslaved in them and become incapable of untangling ourselves from them so as to live in peace.

Many of us do not know that having peace of mind itself could be a worthwhile goal and we can work our way to attain it! It would be even better if we develop such a mindset early in life.

Life essentially consists of certain ways and means within our control and certain happenings and circumstances beyond our control. By acting on those within our control, we can strive to lead a peaceful life. A spiritual and philosophical mindset would add to our efforts.

Here are some steps to lead a peaceful life:

1. Do not compare yourself with others: Your life is your own. Your likes and dislikes, tastes, expectations and standards are your own. Your neighbor or your colleague need not be a benchmark for you to compare yourself or compete with. Their level of education, financial status, social status or spending pattern need not be yours. If at all you have to compare, compare yourself with those who are less privileged than you; those whose lives are more peaceful and less complicated than yours.
2. Do not aspire to make other's dreams your reality: Your father's unfulfilled dream of becoming a doctor need not be your dream. Your mother's dream of becoming a successful dancer need not be yours - unless and until, you, on your own - think the same way.
3. Have a clear-cut self-judgment about your true capabilities, strengths and limitations: You might possess excellent soccer skills within your local league. But it need not mean you are competent enough to play for the national team. Compare yourself with better players and make a sincere judgment: ‘Do I really play or am I capable of playing to that level? Do I have the physical, psychological and financial resources to make myself fit enough to come up to that level? Above all, is such a yearning worth the effort?'

   Sheer positive thinking alone will not do wonders. In the scheme of nature, all are not endowed with same set of skills and resources. If you are capable of judging yourself correctly, you will be endowed with the peace of mind by not pursuing something beyond your reach.

4. Live within your means: This is time-tested age-old wisdom, which is unfortunately forgotten in today's credit card culture. What you buy using credit cards should be payable IN FULL by you when the bill arrives. If you get lured by the "Minimum Amount Due Now," it paves the way for accumulation of debt and consequently, loss of peace, sooner or later. If the object of desire can be purchased by you only through installment, DO NOT SUCCUMB to the temptation of purchase. By bringing in this self-control, you may lose short-term pleasures, but you will enjoy long-term peace.

   Procurement of capital-intensive items like a flat/house should be strictly within your well-thought-out budgets, taking into account your repaying capacity under realistic situations and NOT based on your dreams of making a big fortune in your future endeavors!

5. Regularly save a percentage of your income: At any point in time, should you come across a bad patch in life like losing a job, or a loss in your business, etc., you should be in a position to pull along comfortably at least for a few months on the strength of your savings.
6. Never get addicted to anything: Be it alcohol, smoking, drugs, women, work, profession, money, fame or recognition. Moderation is the key to a peaceful life. Eat moderately. Sleep moderately. Work moderately. Have sex moderately. Do not stretch yourself beyond limits.
7. Run around less: Avoid unnecessary travel. Communicate better and more effectively through the various avenues and media so that personal face-to-face meetings by traveling long distances can be reduced. Delegate more. Remember that traveling long distances taxes your health by upsetting and altering your eating, drinking and sleeping rhythms, which in turn, affect your peace of mind.
8. Intentionally slow down: Don't hanker behind high targets and goals. Reduce your standards of expectation from others. If you are running, switch over to walking! Remember: You don't really have to prove anything about yourself to yourself! Perhaps you can be better off by extending the principle - you don't really have to prove anything about yourself to others, too, if you can!
9. Let wellness of your family take precedence over your profession: Remember: The fundamental needs of any human being is rather simple and basic: Good food, good clothing and a good shelter. Under shelter comes the family. When you have a good conjugal relationship, nice children, healthy food and the loving embrace of the beloved's hands when you are physically or mentally down, you have mostly got what is fundamentally essential for peace. Any other pursuit that goes against these and disturbs these fundamentals will only add to misery.
10. Avoid poking your nose into others' affairs unnecessarily: Extend a helping hand to others, within your capacity and limits, when help is sought from you. Do not overstretch yourself in helping others and get into trouble. Do not offer help with a mind calculating to get something in return in the future.
11. Be health-conscious, but don't make a fetish of your health: By eating in time, eating moderately, eating nutritious food and by exercising moderately, you will maintain your physical health and fitness. Do not read beyond rudimentary facts about various ailments, their symptoms and cure! Excessive knowledge about various ailments will add to wild imaginings about their existence in your body!
12. Live within the mortal framework generally acceptable to the elders in the society: Every new generation makes a compromise in moral standards of the previous generation and dilutes them to a lower level. Moral laxity is conducive for instant gratification and unbridled thrills but a sure ingredient for loss of peace. Sticking to moral standards set by morally sound elders of the previous generations will help you to lead a peaceful life.
13. Have faith in a Higher Power governing all: Have faith in God. Always remember that you are mostly a puppet in the hands of a higher power whose scheme of things is mostly beyond human comprehension. Surrender to that force. Accept and be content about the cards you have received and play with the best of your ability using the cards available in your hand. Accept with humility the outcome of the game.