Cases of parents living in with children are being more and more acceptable in many cultures. Some cultures in different parts of the world actually have this as a norm, or tradition in which the grown child, who has started his family, houses the aging parent as well. Many reasons justify this particular custom – one of which is to take care and ensure the safety of the ageing parent, especially in his critical age. Another one is to encourage family closeness and bonding of all 3 generations – and sometimes, even 4. Yet another reason is to preserve the traditions and rich culture of the family. This is most especially true for immigrants who have chosen to stay outside their country of origin, but would like to preserve and practice their customary activities.
On the other hand, there are also many cases that the effects of having housed your ageing parent are not as joyful as was aforementioned. Living with aging parents cannot only be draining, but it can also be very annoying. Many times, aside from the pressure from work, your first family and the obligations that follow it, bills and other payables, you still have to take care of someone who is, at times, throwing tantrums. Here are a number of tips on how to live happily with an aging parent.
- Wear their shoes. If you think that you are undergoing unfeasible stress that you think is impossible to deal with, and that you have all the right to act awfully since you own the house, then, you are most definitely wrong. Whatever you’re going through, it doesn’t compare to what your ageing parent has gone through for you, and is still going through. As he has been one of the reasons why you are who you are and where you are now, he has made countless sacrifices just to make you and whatever your worth is happen. Aside from this, your ageing parent is suffering from many physical, as well as mental disabilities brought about by old age. His bones are weakening everyday, not to mention the joints and other illnesses that impede every move. Aim to understand and respond accordingly with love, in order to have a harmonious relationship at home.
- Care for them as you would care for your own child. Taking care of an ageing parent is very much similar to taking care of the young. Because of the many disabilities that come with the growing age, many circumstances like eating, drinking, sleeping and even crossing the street are important aspects that need the most attention. You have to ask your ageing parents if they hungry even at times after or in between the 3 meals. Make sure that you watch out for what they eat, but don’t be too tacky when disciplining them. Remember to be courteous at all times since they are, in fact, your parents.
- Privacy and authority. For those ageing parents that do not need much personal assistance, it is best to provide them with enough room to do their own things. They are adults who have gone through a lot in their many years of being the one in charge, and making them feel it again somehow will be good for their mental and physical state. Allow them to walk around the vicinity and make sure that they get enough exercise. At their age, any short walks and deep breathing that they do will do wonders as compared to just sitting on the couch and working their fingers on the remote.
- Medical appointments. Your ageing parent is already old and with this comes a myriad of many illnesses and disabilities. You have to make sure that they get timely medical appointments, and more importantly, you have to be there when it is time for their appointments. You have to make the effort to know what is truly happening to you parent since no one else would take care of them but you.