You are not yet ready for marriage. But you love each other so much and cannot bear to be apart even for a few hours. You talked it over and decided that you will live together. Although not a lifelong commitment, living together with your boyfriend will definitely change the way you live your life. For from this day on, there is another person to consider and all your actions will directly affect both of you.
You will discover things about each other that you never knew before. Conflicts and personality clashes may occur at some point. Mistakes can happen. Knowing all these, you are still willing to give it a go.
Here are some tips for a harmonious life together.
- Before moving in together, discuss what each of you expect from the other and set some ground rules. Discuss each one together and agree on them. Talk about everyday activities like TV time, cooking, grocery shopping, going to work, etc.
- Set some ground rules on how visits from friends and relatives, invited or unannounced should be handled. Some friends and relatives like to come unannounced. There might be friends that annoy either of you. Friends take your time, your space and even your food in the fridge.
- If your boyfriend does not own a house or is renting an apartment, do some trials runs before you sign that contract of lease. If you can afford it, the two of you can go on an extended vacation to get a feel of how it is with just the two you. Try a short term apartment lease first before committing to a long term one.
- Share storage space equally. Do not hoard the vanity with all your cosmetics and other beauty products. Your boyfriend has his own set of toiletry items too. Same rule applies for closet space.
- Do not insist on keeping the toilet seat down.
- Don’t go ballistic when your boyfriend fails to show his appreciation. When you live with someone you tend to forget these things. It does not mean that he does not love you anymore. It means he is comfortable with your presence and he expects you to feel the same way.
- You are his girlfriend, so do not act like a mother. You should trust him and not demand to know what he’s been doing all the time.
- Both of you should learn to compromise. Practice a give-and-take attitude. Both of you need to make sacrifices and concessions since you decided to live together.
- Keep your line of communication open. Resolve small issues that arise. Discussing about what brought about the tiff in the first place prevents it from building up. Do not go to bed angry at each other.
- Get some time off away from each other. Continue to stay in contact with your own set of friends. This creates balance in your life. And you can take a look at your life together from a different angle.
- Share expenses equally to avoid conflict later should your relationship end. Maintain financial freedom and do not depend on your boyfriend for support.
The list above just about covers all the bases. In any form of relationship trusting each other, learning to compromise, keeping an open mind and constant communication are key factors to keep the relationship alive and healthy.