In most sex ed classes, the focus is on sexual health and contraception, rather than on the art of conception. If you are ready to have a child, it's not as simple as you may think. Even though you probably got "the talk" from your parents about where babies come from, it can actually become quite complicated if you're trying to conceive a baby. Here's how to make babies:
- Stop using birth control. Depending on your chosen birth control method, some can keep you from getting pregnant for quite a while after you stop using them. Others, like condoms, have no lasting effects, so you may get pregnant as soon as you start trying.
- Choose optimal timing. In order to make a baby, you must have sex when you are ovulating. For most women, this is about 14 days before the start of their period. Have sex within the five days leading up to ovulation for the best chance of conceiving a child. Timing is actually crucial to conception. However, keep in mind that women's monthly cycles can vary greatly.
- Have intercourse frequently. Having intercourse twice per week, regardless of what week it is or whether you think you are ovulating, will give the best chance of conception. However, more than every other day can dilute the sperm count.
- Have intercourse in any position. Though many will recommend certain positions to increase the chances of conception, in reality it really doesn't matter. No scientific study has shown one position to be better than another for purposes of conception. Ejaculating deep into the vagina, however, is important in any position.
- Use the right lubricant. Some lubricants prevent contraception; avoid these if you're trying to make a baby. Luckily, there are plenty of "safe" lubricants available.
- Understand the role of the orgasm. It is critical for a man to climax in order to make a baby. The majority of the sperm will be in the ejaculate, not in the fluids occurring prior to climax. Although there is no scientific proof that an orgasm for the woman will help with conception, it will certainly not interfere with the process.
- Understand what to do immediately afterwards. If you are trying to get pregnant, stay in bed anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour after intercourse. This will give the sperm time to swim to the egg. Do not douche; this has been proven to lower your chances of conceiving a baby.
- Relax! Trying to conceive a child can be a stressful time for both partners. Don't let the efforts get in the way of your relationship, or put too much pressure on trying to conceive.
As you can see, there are many things they didn't teach you in school about how to make babies. Many couples are surprised to learn that they are not targeting the correct time of month to get pregnant, or are inadvertently doing something that can prevent pregnancy.