What is a family? We all know it's the basic unit of society, where we've been a child and then we've created a family of our own. A family can extend beyond our nucleus to include those people who extend our families ... aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents and even close friends. When we learn to nurture our family then we feel safe, secure, happy and bigger than ourselves. Learn some easy ways to create a harmonious family.
- Every moment counts. Every tone of voice, gesture or words we use can nurture our family members. When we speak to another member of our family we are speaking to ourselves. If you don't like your tone, words or gestures, then change them. How do you change something? Simply choose to.
- Ask yourself if you're being constructive or destructive. Emotions are quite easy to feel. We just have to acknowledge them both in ourselves and others. If you are in doubt whether your tone, gestures or words have been delivered in a harmonious manner, just ask. Once you learn how another person in your family would like you to treat them it's easy to adjust.
- You can hurt the one you love. People who are destructive or abusive can still love their family members. Love has nothing to do with how you treat others. As humans we are given the Gift of Choice. At each moment our mind makes choices which lead to actions. The best way to nurture your family is to be a person who chooses, in a thoughtful manner, how you interact with other family members.
- You're not raising children. In fact you are raising children to become adults. This doesn't mean you treat children like adults. It means you teach children how to be the best adult when they mature. It's your actions that will speak to them and help determine who they will eventually become.
- Mothers and fathers. As a father you are teaching your male children what it is like to become a father...show them your best. As a father you are teaching your daughters what type of men they should be with when they create their own families...show them your best. As a mother, you'll show your sons, by your behavior, how to choose a woman with whom to partner. As a mother you show your daughters what it is to be a woman...show them the best.
- Men don't need to find their feminine self. When a man is in his full maleness he is, by nature, kind, gentle, responsive, helpful, patient, nurturing and loving. These are not feminine attributes. They are human attributes. Men are ruled by their hearts.
- Women don't need to find their masculine self. When women are in their fullness as a female, they are capable, strong, able, skilled, clear, concise and focused. These are not masculine traits, they are human attributes. Women are ruled by their creative energy.
- Nurture yourself. To be able to nurture your family, you must take care of yourself. Women shouldn't give, give, give until they feel like martyrs or exhausted. If you want to give to others, give to yourself first and create a well balanced life. As a man it is important to care for yourself and see your value as a man beyond being a provider. At the end of the day when you return from work, it is your family who can nurture you and truly bring joy into your life.
Each member of the family has a responsibility to work together and care for each other and themselves. Sibling rivalry is taught and accepted. Instead teach your children to care for each other and help in the every day tasks of life. Learn to help when asked. Learn to offer help and learn to see what needs to be done and do it yourself. Become aware that you are creating your family at each moment and with every action. You deserve a nurturing family. This comes from each person in the family creating that.