A new bride might have a difficult relationship with her husband's mother. You may think you will get along and be fast friends but even the nicest woman can make a stressful mother-in-law. No matter what your relationship with your mother-in-law, when she comes to visit at your home, there will be stress. Follow these steps to prepare for a visit from your mother-in-law.
- Acknowledge the shift in your roles. Before you married her son, you probably always met your future mother-in-law on her turf. Now that she is coming to your house, your roles have changed. She is coming to you, leaving her home where she is in control. When she arrives at your home you will both know that she is on your turf, in your home where you have control. Realize that her visit might make her feel a little out of control and overwhelmed.
- Clean up your act. It might be okay for your husband to have left his socks on the living room floor when he lived with his mother but it is not okay now that you have your own home. If you cannot keep the house clean the rest of the time, you still need to make the effort for your mother-in-law's visit. Clean, vacuum and scrub everywhere it is needed. Clean the house with the depth of a yearly spring cleaning.
- Indulge her. If your mother-in-law has a favorite food or type of wine, have it in the house. Place her favorite flowers in the guest room to show her that you value her. These little treats cost you very little but demonstrate your willingness to go the extra mile to make her feel special.
- Give them some time. No matter how much your mother-in-law likes and loves you, she still wants to visit with her son. Give them a lunch out alone together or head to bed early one evening so they can visit.
- Show her respect. Even if you hate your mother-in-law you need to show her respect. By doing so, you show respect to your husband and his relationship with his mother. Don't start arguments with her or let her get you down if she questions your decorating or housekeeping abilities.
Preparing for a visit from your mother-in-law may have you stressed and pulling your hair out but it doesn't have to. Follow these instructions and spend a little time making sure your house is ready for the visit. Then relax and try to enjoy the visit.