How To Read Your Date's Body Language

Dating can be complicated, especially in this world of online dating, speed dating and computer social networking. It is sometimes difficult to know just where you stand with your date. Consider taking some time to read your date’s body language. Whether your date is a man or woman, these tips will help you. By following these steps, you can learn a lot about what their body is saying even with they are tight-lipped.

  1. Pay attention. You cannot understand body language without being attuned to it. You have to watch your date for signals. Be careful though, because paying attention to body language should be subtle. You don’t want your date to know you are watching. You also want to be sure you are paying attention to the conversation so that your date doesn’t misread your own body language.
  2. Start with the hands. They are often the most expressive part of our bodies. Many people can hide their feelings from their facial expression but not from their hands. The date is going well if your companion has open palms or if they rest their face in a cupped hand while watching you. This shows openness and interest. Be concerned about your date’s hands if they are folded, hidden under the table or behind the back. Fidgeting and wringing of hands is a sign of nerves and discomfort.
  3. Check out posture. Posture can be a great indicator of hidden emotion – either nerves or discomfort. If your date is stiff-bodied, has arms crossed or leans back away from you, his interest is either distracted or the date is not going well. A more positive posture is one where your date is leaning toward you or if he is relaxed and open.
  4. Look at what your date is seeing. Note where your date’s eyes are focused. If the eyes are focused away from you, toward your feet or only at his own hands, then he is either nervous or wants to get away. If he looks you in the eye when he talks to you, he is interested.
  5. Observe facial expressions. Smiles are an obvious sign of interest just as sneers are the biggest clues of disdain. A blank, unexpressive face is indicative of both boredom and someone trying to hide his emotions or even lie. Raised eyebrows suggest sarcasm if accompanied by a smile.
  6. Notice touching. Touching is a two-fold issue, especially if your date is a woman. Watch for her to touch her hair, lightly rub her arm or chew nervously on her fingernail. These touches indicate she is interested. Pay attention to when and how she touches you. Most touches indicate interest (except for a slap across the face!). Subtle brushes across your arm or hand indicate your date is open to continue your conversation.

Understanding body language is not an exact science. The key to excelling is to pay attention to the entire person. Trust your instincts. If someone feels uncomfortable or tense, he probably is. But make sure that you check your own body language. It’s possible that your date is just reacting to the aggression or disinterest you are projecting.


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