Turn Competition into Compassion
Parents, today, put a great emphasis on reinforcing and rewarding their child’s efforts to be the best, to work the hardest and have a competitive edge. Parenting often takes the form of punishing negative behaviors. In contrast, parents presume that their children will be innately kind, thoughtful and compassionate. Parents do not realize that ACTS OF KINDNESS are a LEARNED BEHAVIOR.
TEACHING OUR CHILDREN TO APPRECIATE THE REWARDS OF BEING KIND AND THE IMPORTANCE OF THIS VALUE IS CRITICAL.
SPREADING KINDNESS WILL CREATE A KINDER, MORE COMPASSIONATE WORLD. IF NOT NOW, WHEN?
The following Guidelines will help Build Caring Relationships both at home and in the community.
1. Create a positive reinforcement system at home to promote Acts of Kindness. I used a Kindness Board when my three sons were young. After a set number of kind acts, they would get a “prize.” In doing so, they gained a better understanding of what it means to be kind. They also came to appreciate the warm feelings that you experience when you are kind, compassionate and caring toward others.
2. Talk about what it means to do Acts of Kindness outside of the family. My family participates every year in a “Mitzvah” Day through our temple. This is an outreach project in which each family has the opportunity to volunteer and help nonprofit agencies accomplish tasks that need to be done.
3. PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH! The most powerful way to teach and reinforce doing Acts of Kindness is for parents to do them themselves. When parents show kindness and thoughtfulness toward each other, they are serving as positive role models. Being kind and compassionate toward your spouse rather than being critical or judgmental will strengthen your marital relationship and bring greater caring and closeness into your family.
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