How To Understand What Your Child is Saying

Effective communication is an essential aspect of proper parenting. When you listen carefully to your child’s words, you can understand his or her emotions and feelings. Proper communication with your child builds their self-esteem, teaches respect and discipline, and generally makes parenting easier and more enjoyable. You can understand your child better by following some simple guidelines and tips.

• Look closely at your child. Eye contact is important in communication, as it can tell about the state of mind of the speaker. You should look for other non-verbal signs of communication such as their facial expression, hand gestures, and body movement. These are some non-verbal ways of conveying a message to the listener.
• Pay full attention to your child when he or she is speaking. You should avoid doing a task while talking to them, as doing so can make them feel that you do not have time to listen to them. Avoid being preoccupied with something else. Listen to every single word he or she says, and concentrate on what your child is conveying.
• Be familiar with your child’s language. You should be familiar with his or her diction, accent and choice of words. Your child may acquire his or her own style of speaking as he/she grows, so being familiar with your child’s lingo helps in deciphering the message that your child is telling you. Your child may also have difficulty pronouncing some words, knowing these words help in further understanding your child.
• Learn to accept your child’s full range of emotions. You must accept the feelings and emotions your child may show during speaking, including those that you do not like. You should guide your child to express his or her unpleasant feelings in an appropriate and acceptable way.
• Avoid interrupting your child. You should practice this common courtesy while your child is speaking to allow him to finish what he or she is saying. Interrupting them is rude, and may cause your child to avoid communication with you.
• Be approachable. You do not want to be distant to your child. This makes communication hard, and creates a gap between parent and child. Do not be aloof with his or her current emotions and feelings. Be approachable so that your child can clearly express his or her feelings without fear of being ignored or avoided.
• Ask questions to gather more information about what he or she is saying. Asking questions is a great way to get more details about what your child is saying. Don’t ask them in a formal interrogating manner though, as this would make the child think that what he or she did is wrong. You should ask them in a kind manner, as it will show that you are interested in their life and that you care for them. This will boost their confidence and self-esteem.
• Practice reflective listening. You should paraphrase what your child is saying so you can get a clearer view on what your child is saying. It will bridge whatever communication gap you may have.
• When giving feedback, keep it short and specific. You should give feedback or a reaction to your child as soon as possible. Avoid long lectures that may bore your child, and also avoid harsh and judgmental words which may hurt your child’s self-esteem.