Average rating:
Finding companionship for a short time while visiting away from home or for a long term committed relationship can be safe and fun with a few precautions.
There are times when having someone to share time and experiences with is preferable to being alone. We aren't looking to start a family so people may think we are too old to date. As a mature woman I found using a dating service meant the people I would meet were pre-screened or I had a chance to know something about them confidentially before I decided if I wanted to met them.
Step 1:

Know what you want in a potential companion. Think back over your best experiences and make a list of the characteristics you hope to find. Be very specific.

  • Clean and tidy
  • Respectful
  • Likes to laugh, play cards, dance etc.
  • Enjoys a party
  • Whatever is important to you
Step 2:

Make copies of your list of qualities and then check off which items describe you. By knowing what we want and knowing what we offer, we can negotiate new relationships.

Step 3:

Research different dating companies and see which ones meet your finances and seem to fit your style. While many seniors want a sexual relationship, many do not. Look to see if the company you are considering reflects your standards.

Step 4:

Keep in mind that you are going to want to meet lots of potential matches before you get too seriously involved. Do not expect to meet the one right person immediately. Take your time and enjoy the process.

Step 5:

Do not give out personal information to a stranger. Use email or the telephone with your number blocked until you get to know the person. Take one of the copies of your wish list and write the person's name at the top then ask questions about each item.

  • Do you think being clean is important?
  • Do you have enough money to be comfortable?
  • Do you have pets?
  • How often do you like to play cards?

Make the questions flow into casual conversations and keep the answers on the person's page. This will help you know what to talk about and if you are talking to more than one person at a time it helps keep them straight in you mind.

Step 6:

Once you find someone you want to meet, find a safe public place. Pick a place like the food court at a mall or a public library where you can get away without being followed or help is available if you feel frightened.

Step 7:

Ask a new person about their family and friends. Someone with no connection who doesn't belong to any associations or who cannot tell you information that connects them to other people should be avoided. Check their story by asking details about what they tell you. You may be surprised that you know people in common or enjoy some of the same things.

Step 8:

Relax and enjoy chatting with them, meeting them and spending time together. If you feel safe, plan to see where they live. How a person keeps their place will give you valuable information about them. Then let them see your place. Be sure to tell someone where you will be and when to expect you back.

It can be hard for some people to date again as a mature person, but with the wisdom from life experiences you should be able to have some fun and enjoy many new experiences.
Marilyn Barnicke Belleghem M.Ed.'s picture
About this Author:

Marilyn

Family Therapist, Consultant, Author, Speaker
http://www.mbcinc.ca 


View more information and all guides by Marilyn Barnicke Belleghem M.Ed.

Be the First to Comment on this Article