How To Know if You're a Metrosexual

Male model posing for the camera

A metrosexual is a man who spends a certain amount of time and money on his lifestyle, specifically his appearance.  Here are a few questions that will help you to ascertain whether or not you are, indeed, a metrosexual.

  1. Do gay men hit on you? If you're a metrosexual, it's already happened.  (Who can blame them for trying?)  And while you were flattered, you're really a het (and maybe even a "hef") at heart.  The term, "metrosexual," as originally coined, describes heterosexual men who have adopted the dress and appearance of men who identify themselves as homosexuals.
  2. Do you carry a purse? A purse gives you an automatic entrée into metrosexualdom.  Welcome.  And by the way, which designer?
  3. How do you feel about your socks? As you read this, do you know what color socks you are wearing?  Are they designer socks?  Did you put these particular socks on this morning because they were at the top of your drawer or because they go well with your outfit?  And finally, do you ever go shopping for socks only?  Your consideration of your socks reflects your overall concern with your clothes:  Metrosexual men care about socks, along with everything else that adorns their sacred bods.
  4. Do you wear tighty whities? A metrosexual would never be caught dead in a pair of tighty whities.  Given the choice, they would rather go without any underwear at all than succumb.  And come to think of it, going commando sounds pretty good to a metrosexual (maybe in his new leather pants)!
  5. Do you use more than one product in your hair? Do you refer to your hair products as "products?"  Two yeses here make you a met.  And you get bonus points if your hair is highlighted.
  6. Have you ever used hair removal services other than shaving? You know -- waxing, tweezing, laser, electrolysis?  If so, you've entered metro country.
  7. Do you receive spa services? Does a paraffin dip help to calm you?  Manicures, pedicures, facials and exfoliation are all part of a metrosexual's routine.  Bonus points if you're a regular and/or see your stylist socially.
  8. Do you borrow products from the women in your life? Does your co-worker have a moisturizer that you just can't go without a hit of come mid-afternoon?  Does your girlfriend wonder why she seems to be going through her toner so quickly?  When she's not looking, do you use her shaving gel instead of yours?  And when she is looking, do you use it anyway?  Metro alert!

Rumor has it that metrosexuality is on its way out.  But I don't believe for a moment that David Beckham will give up his market share without a fight!

 

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Dec
20

Please tell me it's NOT on its way out! Men are so much more attractive when they care about their appearance!

By Amanda Larson