How To Calm a Child who has Aspergers

Children with Asperger's Syndrome are mostly viewed as intelligent and having endearing personalities. However, these children might have a difficult time making friends, as they often lack skills in socialization. A lot of children with Aspergers have difficulty controlling their emotions, or expressing these constructively. Most of them have tantrums or meltdowns when they feel an overload of emotions.

Children with Asperger's will usually have routines or repetitive behaviors that they do almost all day. It will therefore be important to you to slowly introduce new routines that can help get him to calm down.

Here are some way by which you can help kids with special needs become calmer.

Try meditation. Anyone who has difficulty controlling or expressing emotions can be helped by meditation. This can be done in a couple of ways. First, you can have the child sit down or lie down and have his eyes closed. Ask him to take deep and slow breaths. Have him inhale slowly through the nose, then hold his breath for about five seconds, then exhale through the mouth. You can guide him through this experience. Say something like “take a slow, deep breath.” Then, follow through with “hold it … hold it …” and then “now breathe out through your mouth slowly.”

Make sure you are calm when you give him instructions, so that he will be likewise affected by your sense of calm. Say your instructions in a clear, simple manner. Do it in such a way that you will be easily understood.

Another way is to have him lie or sit down and visualize something in his mind. Have him focus on an idea or a scene that is calming, such as a relaxing vacation by the beach, or a stroll in the park. Narrate the scenario to make him feel as if it were really happening.

Establish a quiet time. Another way you can help calm down a child with Asperger's is through routine. Establish a certain few minutes or hours of the day as quiet time. This can be after dinner, or before settling down for the night. He can do activities like reading, drawing, or art works. These can help get him settled down and ready for a good night’s rest. Aside from keeping calm, writing and drawing can also help any child learn to express himself.

Use music. You can also use the soothing power of music to help calm down a child with Asperger's. Use classical music, particularly instrumental pieces by known composers. Having soothing music playing throughout your house can also promote a calming environment, even for yourself.

You can buy CDs of orchestral renditions by Mozart, Beethoven and other notable composers. Just try to avoid those classical, orchestral or band music that have heavy undertones, or that might not be too calming.

These exercises don’t work overnight, and it might take you a few tries to get it right. Don’t feel bad if you don’t immediately see the results of your calming efforts.


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