How To Survive the First Weeks of Motherhood

Time.

You can never have enough. Let friends and family leave voice messages instead of answering every call. You can always call them back; the truth is, most people are very understanding and know that your time is no longer yours!

The same goes for visitors. You can let guests know you won't be available before a certain time daily. I simply did not answer the door before midday in those first weeks. My reasons were pretty valid. I wanted to have my baby to myself by spending those precious first hours of the day with him. Your baby is brand new and learning about you as you learn about him or her. Another reason was that even after having a baby I still did not want anyone seeing me looking scruffy or my home untidy.

By having a start off point for phone-calls and guests, you have the advantage of not feeling that life is spinning out of control as you have your feet firmly on the ground before you join the rest of the world!

Rest.

Your baby is probably yet to develop a pattern. You'll have to learn with her by sleeping when she does. The result: you get some well needed rest! Don't be tempted to catch up on housework when baby is asleep. There is no telling how long you'll be up tonight, so make the most of now!

Accept all offers of help.

Everyone says to you: "Just let me know what you need and I'll be there." Now is the time to take up those offers of help. Ask friends to run by the store to pick up items you might need like fruit, bread, milk. Ask another while visiting to make you some sandwiches to store in the refrigerator. These will come in handy as you need to eat regularly, but you have less time and energy to prepare meals. When close friends or family visit, tell them to grab the vacuum cleaner and kindly run through the house with it. And while you're at it, get them to do the dishes. You will need extra help especially if you had a Cesarean section like I did with my first son.

Thank you for the advice...

You will probably be inundated with other people's opinion on how to care for your baby, from what brand of diaper to use, through how to handle colic and how warmly to dress baby in the summer. Keep in mind that while babies do not come with a handbook, you are mommy and are capable of making decisions. Babies are remarkably resilient and you should feel comfortable trying out what works. It can be difficult with family, especially mothers and mothers-in-law. A polite "thank you so much for the advice, that is such helpful information!" should suffice. Don't feel you must do all you are instructed just to please them. They don't have to know you tossed that odd smelling ointment in the trash! You have maternal instincts. Use them and your confidence will start to soar.

Emotions.

You may feel you don't even know yourself! That's okay as it's just your hormones trying to get balanced again. Most women get what is often called 'baby blues'. Symptoms can include feeling emotional or irrational, bursting into tears for no apparent reason, feeling irritable or touchy, or feeling depressed and anxious. These feelings tend not to last more than a few days.

In some cases baby blues do not go away and can lead to postnatal depression. This can also occur 2 to 8 weeks after birth and is a very distressing condition. If you think you might be suffering from postnatal depression, don't struggle alone. It is not a sign that you are a 'bad mother' or that you're unable to cope. Contact your health-care provider. With or without baby blues, try as much as it is under your control to create fond memories, as you will never forget these days.