A matron of honor has more experience in married life compared to the bride, and her toast should reflect this fact. Part accolade, part blessing and part advice, your speech should provide insight the bride will find useful in the next couple of years. When you are invited to become a matron of honor, spend a couple of days preparing a thought-provoking speech that the entire wedding party will cherish. And if you’re feeling nervous just thinking of speaking in front of a room of people, you can comfort yourself with the reminder that for that special day, all eyes are on the bride.
Here are the steps to writing a matron of honor speech.
- Recall life moments of the bride that exemplify her character. Choose moments in the past when you are actually right there with the bride to make it personal and therefore special. You can go as far back as her childhood days to pinpoint the very beginnings of her idiosyncrasies. Prioritize any moments that foreshadow her relationship with the groom or her wedding day. For example, you can retell the story of the bride when she kept a list of the things she wanted in a husband back when she was a little girl.
- Share moments of the bride and groom together which gives hope to their life as a couple. If you’ve just met the groom within the past year, you can share your first impressions about him. If he has been a long-time acquaintance of the family, share stories about the two of them when they were younger.
- Tone down your own stories. The whole event is about the bride, and nothing you say must distract from that theme. Skip any lengthy tales about your own experiences and stick only to advice that applies to the bride. Even your shared moments about the bride must be focused on her. And especially avoid sharing any tragedies and dramas in your marriage during this happy occasion.
- Avoid sharing stories that may embarrass the bride or create awkwardness during the reception. If you haven't already shared those stories during the bridal shower, it's best to keep them to yourself.
- Rehearse for several days a week before the event. Make sure your delivery is smooth and heartfelt. Practice before a trusted friend and let her point out the shortcomings and make recommendations. You can bring a cheat sheet to make sure you don’t forget the important parts but avoid bringing the whole speech, as you may be tempted to read off it rather than share it from the heart.
- Consider giving a special performance instead of a speech. If you are skilled in dancing, singing or playing a musical instrument, you may give a unique presentation in tribute to the wedding. If you are not particularly known to play an instrument or dance, you can make a special impact during the event by taking time to practice a choreographed maneuver or a musical piece. You may also give a funny and touching multimedia presentation, but make sure the equipment is working on the day itself and provide plenty of backup in case your primary presentation fails. It is also safer to rehearse one last time a few hours before your performance. Finally, by making a special craftwork for the bride then unveiling it on the day itself can guarantee to wow the newlyweds and the audience.
Your particular viewpoint as a close friend of the bride and former bride can be your best asset when writing a speech. By making it meaningful and heartfelt, you can make the bride’s day all the more special.