How To Be a Friend by Listening Instead of Speaking

Probably one of the hardest things we as humans have to deal with is helping our friends when we feel they need us the most. Many times, we would like to offer advice, only to find it is neither needed nor wanted. Many times, a friend just needs to bend someone's ear.

Here are a few situations when it is better to just listen and talk less.

1. Many times, when our friends call us with a problem, they are not looking for a solution, just someone to listen. JUST LISTEN...
2. If your friend asks you what you think, DO NOT fall for it. If your friend is asking you to judge her situation, DON'T DO IT...
3. When a friend stops by to see how you are doing, and you sense that she is not herself, allow her the time to talk. You may be the only one she reaches out to. Again, just listen...

Here are a few things that you can do to learn to listen more and speak less.

1. Remind yourself this is your friend's trial and the decisions made need to be her own.  Many friendships have been lost because a friend gave the wrong advice. No matter how helpful and sincere the friend's intentions were, the friendship was lost.
2. Let her know that you will be there to listen to her whenever she needs to talk. Many times, a person just needs a sounding board. (You are the sounding board.)
3. Finally keep it a secret and pray. You will find that for most situations, time is the healer. What seems so bad today by tomorrow is only a memory.

Reminder: Be the friend that you would like your own friend to be. We are all human and humans make mistakes. Do not be so quick to judge.

Many times, the greatest friends we have are the ones who just listen to us the most. The truth is, even your best responses may not be what your friend is seeking. Allow her the time to talk and sort her own feelings out. This way, the decision she comes to will be her own...and not yours.