How To Handle Backstabbers

Friends are treasures we ought to cherish, but what do you do when you find out that the ones you trust have been talking behind your back? They are called backstabbers, the ones who spread gossip around in school, or in the office, or in the neighborhood. They are the ones who give you a hug and a kiss and tell you how wonderful you are, but trash talk behind your back. They steal your ideas, and make your life miserable. They exist everywhere you go, and there is no chance of avoiding one.

Here are some techniques you can use when you have identified a backstabber in your lot:

  • Keep your composure. Backstabbers usually exaggerate or fabricate stories about you, and it pleases them to see you react. It is best to keep your composure, act as you would in a normal day, and do not let it get to you. Do not sink to their level, as it might just worsen the situation. Nothing annoys the backstabbers more than to see you happy and unaffected.
  • Never speak ill of anyone. With backstabbers everywhere, you will never know if the one you have been confiding in is also one. Keep your opinions to yourself and with select people you highly trust. It is best not to be a backstabber yourself; otherwise, it will just become a vicious cycle of backstabbing.
  • Make more friends. Humility and friendship should be the top priority to prevent backstabbers from picking on you. The more friends you have, the less likely you will be attacked. However, there may be some envious people who will misinterpret this. But it is better to have more friends than enemies. Befriend even those people who you know are backstabbers. Be nice to them even if they have not been too nice, and free your heart from hatred, as this will only affect your performance at school, work or at home. Nothing is more triumphant than converting your enemy into a friend.
  • Know when to shut your mouth. Of course, if the need arises, you have to defend yourself from false accusations and exaggerated stories. Defend yourself if you must, but also assess your thoughts before they become words. Be careful in what you say, as it might aggravate the situation. Do not get into an argument when you are very emotional, or when you are angry. Control your temper, let it pass until you can think objectively, and then discuss the matter at hand without raising your voice, and avoid being too defensive.

Be honest all the time. Your integrity will show eventually, so always be honest and you can be sure that whatever stories the backstabbers will fabricate, the people who trust you and love you will back you up, and the truth will always surface to redeem you. Always choose what is right in any situation, and never become a backstabber. Instead, you should help backstabbers get tired of their business so that they too will eventually stop.


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